Chicken in a Burger Suit

This week’s mission: preseasoned, grillable chicken patties and fancified crackers.

From Tub to Mouth

This week’s mission: premade spreadable cheesecake filling and high-end mass-market soups.

Sexy Pink Tequila

This week’s mission: a healthier mass-market peanut butter and reposado tequila flavored with hibiscus flower.

Low-Rent Umami

This week’s mission: a pseudo-healthy version of ground-beef stretcher, and a chemically enhanced mass-market cookie.

Tea Bags for Cocktails?

This week’s mission: frozen Italian meals with a reasonably healthy twist and tea bags for your mixed drink.

King of Chaat

A Q&A with the reigning gol gappas vendor of Delhi.

A Better Bottled Coffee Drink

This week’s mission: fancy frozen pasta and bottled milky-coffee treats.

Trashy Breakfast Food Gets Seasonal

This week’s mission: summery toaster pastries and low-cal fruity soda.

Rice Krispies on Steroids

This week’s mission: Classic breakfast cereal gets bigger, multigrainier, and fruitier.

Thankful for Burgundy

It’s a special treat to taste these Thanksgiving-friendly wines in their true habitat.

World of Warcraft–Flavored Soda

This week’s mission: a beverage for gamers.

Another Bad Attempt at a Diet Dessert

This week’s mission: a prefab, low-cal sundae, and pear-apple juice.

What the Hell Is Ice Cream Soft Candy?

This week’s mission: Down-market candy gets a makeover, and a really bad idea for brand extension.

Shelf-Stable Ice Cream Float Disaster

This week’s mission: a fake prefab float, and a better-quality Nestlé Crunch bar.

Get Healthy Real Easy

This week’s mission: two servings of vegetables in a powder and one in a soup.